Well Happy New Year then everyone. Whew.
Christmas was great. I was really glad to have a whole month to relax during a festive season and take time to get some bloody enjoyment out of it. I even managed not to put on the requisite ten holiday pounds. I rang the New Year in rather feebly by barely being awake at 12. I was in bed, listening to the radio and waiting for it to happen so I could go to sleep. Despite my lack of festivities about it, I was and still am feeling that now, is as good a time as any to believe in positive changes and a truly happy new year. And that wraps up the sappy sentiment.
Highlights of 2008 off the top of my head:
1. Quitting my damn job!
2. Getting the kitten (who's latest name is Little Lebowski)
3. Seeing Tennessee get his Engineering ring.
4. Pretty much everything we did in California and especially Oregon and Washington state.
Predicted highlights for 2009:
1. Getting married at Voodoo Donuts in Portland this April (finance gods, be kind to us!).
2. Figuring out what the hell I want to do for work??
3. Growing out my damn hair and getting a half decent hair cut for once...
So, doesn't seem like much but number 2 there will be taking a lot of time and energy I think.
In the meantime, with my open days, I have been shaking my booty and sewing bags and knitting a sweater and rearranging the house in a never ending search for pure efficiency and Swedish minimalism. I am soooo far from that goal in our place here. Sigh.
Actually, we've been thinking of moving. All of a sudden, upon returning home after Christmas, I realized, I was ready for something new. I'm ready to be back in the city. Albeit, in a concrete, 100% soundproof apartment but, as soon as we find that in the right place for the right rent, I'm ready to leave here. It did me good being here. It was a huge source of relief and peace. The river and the trees and the garden and the fireplace and our very own walls, shared with no one else...truly our little introvert home. Now, I find I look less out at the river, the winters are freezing, even with the fireplace, heat and wood cost a fortune, the train dictates our lives and our little house is falling apart at the seams. Cracks are breaking through on the walls and ceiling and I'm scared to step in certain spots, lest I fall right through the floor.
We are brewing the idea, we'll start looking, no hurry. When I find a place, I'll give notice and that's it. I used to have nightmares about moving from here accidentally and regretting it. As much as I loved it here, I didn't like how attached I was. I was scared I wouldn't ever be able to leave, even if I had to. Now, here I am thinking about it voluntarily. So there. Embracing the chaos.
Sometimes, riding the wave of change and chaos scares me stupid, sometimes it's exhilarating and feels like the whole point of living. I hope this year it can be more of the latter.
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