Moist and tender.

If you've kept up with my blog (and thank-you for that if you have), you may have noticed a trend for certain things to happen once every month. Usually, around pms time I write a blog that's dripping with deathly desolation, then write a blog about almost getting into a fistfight or some other altercation, then I cut my own hair. (Maybe Britney just has really bad PMS now that I think of it).

Thankfully, I have not shaved my head, but this months DIY haircut has turned out not too bad. I'm lucky that I don't mind having mental patient hair. I pushed my last hairstylist in Toronto to the point of getting really upset when I asked for more "trucker" in my layers. He said he just wasn't comfortable pushing it so far as for it to be beyond ironic and instead, firmly in the territory of just plain, god-awful. So I went elsewhere and he was right-it turned out god-awful but I'd rather that than soccer mom. I digress however...

This time, I simply figured I'd snip a few layers framing my face as my bob has grown long and boring. It turned out alright. I noticed, while brushing my teeth, that if I were to flip the layers out, I could look just like Linda Evans à la Dynasty. Not that I'd want to but still, interesting to note. At first, right after I had cut it in the morning that i woke up late, refusing to go any further with my morning ablutions until the job was done, even if that meant going to work in my pajamas, I thought: "OH no! I've given myself a DIY Davy Jones! I look the same as if I were a teenage kid in the late 60's who thought he could cut his own hair like Davy Jones to get more chicks but instead will have to wear a toque like Michael Nesmith to cover it up." But turned out, it wasn't all that bad. Actually, if the rest of my hair was much longer, it would totally be Bruce Dickisonesque.

That is my new goal by the way. Be more like Bruce Dickinson. I will ask myself, "What would Bruce Dickinson do?", each time I have a dilemna or trouble choosing an item off the menu at a restaraunt or whatever. "What would Bruce Dickinson have for dinner tonight?"

I used to consult Dee Snider. Obviously, that got me nowhere.

Ah yes, time and energy devoted to describing my hair through pop-culture and then publishing it online as if anyone could possibly care! I feel a poem coming on...a rhyming one....

Uh, nope sorry. I guess I don't after all.

Oh wait!

Hair hair
care care
dare dare
bear bear
And then you die.

Great eh? So deep and delicious. Moist and tender.