So long, farewell, auf wiedersehen, smell ya later.

Adapting to change is something I am not very good at historically. Laying in bed a few nights ago, I calculated that I've moved about 15 times in the past 16 years. Each time, I go through a wistful longing for what I must leave behind, always in an overly dramatic fashion.

Of all the places I've lived, I'd say this is the one I should feel the most
bittersweet regret about.

The past few evenings, after getting L to sleep, I'd lie on the couch as the sun sets and just quietly listen to the outside. Here is what I heard each time: A red wing blackbird with it's nest on our roof, chirping, a mother duck calling out to it's ducklings that nest near our wall by the river edge, waves of the river rolling over the currents, the occasional airplane passing high above and other than that...silence. That, my friends, is something I should be expecting to pine over, after I leave it behind.

However, instead of worrying if I've made a grave error in deciding to move, which is what I usually do, I just feel ready this time. Maybe, after 15 tries, I'm getting better at it. Maybe, I'm too sleep-deprived to care? Maybe, I'm just so looking forward to life being a little more convenient and having friends and family closer by for us and for L to grow up with and know these people, that all the sensitive sentimentality I usually feel, is just not getting any ice time.

So back to civilization, back to neighbours and the centre of town, back to Ontari-ari-o we go.

Bye-bye river, bye-bye quiet, bye-bye taking 12 buses and trains to get anywhere, bye-bye social isolation and bye-bye freezing our friggin asses off in the winter. Bye-bye to this little white shack on the water. 'Twas nice knowing you, you served me well, but smell ya later.

We have a new phone number, a new address and they roll delightfully off the tongue. I've purged a good deal of wordly possesions and plan on purging even more. Fresh start, fresh walls and all that hopefull jazz.

The Avett Brothers say: "When you run make sure you run to something and not away from..." True dat! Word.

I've been drinking the most awful smoothy while typing this. We're trying to use up what's left in the fridge. You're picturing a smoothy made from old apples and relish and hotdog buns? Well, it's not that bad. It has almond milk and thawed mangoes and peaches and strawberries...sounds ok so far, but then I added some hemp powder for protein and fibre. Hemp powder sort of congeals after it sits for a while and turns things brownish green and stays grainy like fine sand. Mmmm. Makes you want to go have a smoothy huh? I should have just ate some cold pizza like I was tempted to.

Anyway, one more day here. Tomorrow it's me and L on the train together for 6 hours, annoying the crap out of all the snooty snoots in first class (I splurged). Wish us luck.

Now I go dump this evil in a glass and get do-overs on breakfast.