I'm living "The Office."

This is my SECOND blog for one day. (see below for first.)

I just lived an episode of "The Office".

The president of the company came back and told us that he'd found a gift for the secretary's 5 year anniversary in his desk. He'd forgotten about it for 2 weeks. He told us we all had to go up to reception to award it to her. So the 8 of us go into reception and she is on the phone looking disturbed. She doesn't even glance up at us or acknowledge our presence at all. We all know from previous conversations with her that she is in the middle of getting divorced and remortgaging her house to pay her husband off to get rid of him.

So she was on the phone with the bank because she was having problems getting the money. We are all standing around watching her try to remortgage her house while she completely ignores us. After a 2 or so agnozing minutes, the president says we'll come back later.

We go back to our desks and El presidente lingers around waiting. He is in a chit-chattting mood and makes a remark about my legwarmers. (I'm sure you are all picturing me on some kind of flash dance outfit).
He said, "Weren't they fashionable way back when?"
I say, "Yes. These are the same pair I wore when I was 11 years old actually."

He says, "When was that, five years ago?"

I say, "Triple it and you are closer."

"26?", he says and I realize my math skill suck. "32.", I tell him.

He says, "No way. I want to see some ID." He's not saying that to be jokey or flattering. He does not believe me and suspects me of being a liar with my pants afire.

I say, "You want to see my driver's license?"

He says, "Yes I do." and then thoroughly inspects it. He informs me that he would not have put me past 26. That's a very specific number.

Thankfully, the secretary comes back at this point to see what we all wanted. He shoves the box at her and says, "Sorry it's 2 weeks late. You already know what it is because you picked it out for yourself, but open it anyway."

Since we are all at our desks, she has no choice but to stand out in the open, in the middle of the floor, all by herself, while we all watch her open an unwrapped cardboard box. It's a clock.

She says, "It's a clock." President says, "Just like you picked out."

Vice-president man takes it from her to inspect it. "That's a good clock. Very nice. Nice choice. Look, it has a barometer."

She informs him that it is useful to her for when she makes soap in her sparetime. Apparently, barometric pressure affects soapmaking.

He says, "So you just will stick this clock in the soap?"

She says, "Ha ha. Yes. That is right." Not seeming entirely sure wether or not he was joking. I wasn't sure either actually.

It only lasted a few minutes but it was painful. Five years and you get a stupid clock for sticking in soap.